BDSM and Kink at home

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For those just starting out in BDSM, I'd advise you to start with everyday objects, before going out and buying expensive equipment that you might not like later. You don't need to invest in expensive swifts and whips; all you need is a little creativity.

When engaging in any kind of BDSM play, it's important to set limits before you start, and stick to them. Start slowly and work your way up.

Define safe words (words to slow down or stop games. The most common are: green, yellow, orange, red). Respect your partner and remember it's a game. Be prepared for subdrop. 

BDSM at home and the misuse of objects

I regularly use everyday objects in my sessions. I love perverting the most mundane objects. If you've read older posts, there have been a few BDSM elements early on in my sexual experiences, even if I didn't realize it at the time.

One of my very first sexual partners loved anal. Young and naive as I was, I put all sorts of things in his ass (which, on reflection, weren't all "anal"). safe" ). We also used to use wooden spoons for the impact gamescandles and toothpicks to give us more sensations.

I still use some of these objects today, and I love transforming objects found in hardware stores or flea markets into instruments with which I can torture my victims.

Let's start with the kitchen (my favorite place in the house). I've already mentioned wooden spoons and toothpicks. Rubber spatulas are also great for impact play, as they make a really fun sound when they slap the fleshy parts of your partners' buttocks.

Be careful where you strike: here are a few images to help you.

And why not a fork ? Leave marks on your partner's delicate skin. And why not let it run through her hair? I shiver just thinking about it.

Kitchen string can be used for bondage, nipple torture or CBT. Be sure to always have safety scissors with you in case bondage ever gets too tight.

Ice cream is fun for sensory play. Rub it all over your partners' bodies, melting it drop by drop all over the place. If they're a bit masochistic, you can add salt, which will lower the temperature of the ice and may cause slight burns.

Ginger is regularly used for a practice called figging" . Take a piece of peeled ginger and insert it into the anus. This produces a gentle burn that's just delicious. You can also rub it on other mucous membranes for other sensations. Some people go much further with other burning substances, but I always recommend starting gently and then going further. Remember that you can always intensify things next time, but ending a session that's been too intense isn't fun for anyone.

How about making your partner kneel on dry rice? It may seem like nothing, but after a few minutes it can be very difficult. Personally, I ask my submissives to pick up the grains afterwards, which teaches them a lesson in patience...

If you want a little more danger ; knives make wonderful tools. Blindfold your partner and rub them right next to their ears. This alone will make them quiver in anticipation. Then run the cold blades over their skin, passing gently over the most sensitive parts. Remember, there are two sides to a knife. Play it safe, especially when you're playing intense psychological games.

Even if some of the joy of BDSM is based on fear, the first priority is your safety and that of your partner.

I'm a big fan of Splosh "Or playing with food. You can use any number of practices, such as throwing food at your partner, rubbing it on her body or chewing and spitting on her. It's both fun and humiliating. There's something so childlike about it that my partner and I usually burst out laughing uncontrollably during a session.

Speaking of food and humiliation, you can order your submissive to eat from a dog bowl on the floor. It's a quick way to dehumanize him and a form of degradation often used. Want to take it a step further? Then turn him into a pig who rolls around in the food. Force him to make pig noises when he puts food everywhere. Don't forget to use a tarpaulin to keep everything clean...

Cellophane is perfect for fornophilia (turning a person into an object). I use lots of cellophane rolls for this, turning my submissives into human tables and chairs, desks, lamps or anything else you can imagine. I love bondage with cellophane, because it's quite restrictive and you can easily make holes in the places you want to torture. Of course, no cellophane on the face - a dead submissive is useless!

Clothespins are among the most popular everyday objects for BDSM play. You can safely use them just about anywhere on your body. Trust me, it's tried and tested! There are different types of clothespins, so test them on yourself before using them on your partner. Start with classic wooden / bamboo pegs. Larger ones are weaker than shorter ones. I have hundreds (thousands?), which I use according to what I want to torture.

An important point: when you take them off, it hurts even more than when you put them on, because the blood returns to the pinched area. Take advantage of this by pressing on that area. Yes, I'm mean.

Chinese chopsticks can be used for a variety of games. You can bind them with rubber bands to create vice-like clamps for nipples, ears, toes or any other protruding part of the body... You can tie them with cling film or bondage tie and tap them on the shins, giving the submissive the impression of being tapped directly on the bones. My favorite use is for dilating the anus or vagina. Start with 8 rods in a condom, then insert them one at a time, until you have 30, 40, 50... or more. One of my partners had 100, but we've been practicing for a long time. We could have gone further, but I ran out of chopsticks!

Bottle caps. I remember a race between two women with capsules taped to the soles of their feet. It was great fun! You can also tie them together and wrap them around the body in strategic places. As with clothespins, when you remove them, the returning blood causes temporary pain.

Elastic bands are also great toys. Wrap it around different parts of the body, pull and release. Depending on the strength of the rubber bands and how far you pull, this can be very painful. You can bind several rubber bands together and wrap them around the torso. Be careful, as this often leaves marks, particularly on sensitive areas such as the abdomen, ribs or inner arms and legs.

Using dice or card games can also be fun. Write down a list of 6 things you'd like to do and let fate decide... you can have a card to determine how many spankings they'll get, how many orgasms they'll have in a week, how long they'll have to stay in a given position... and so on.

Of course, this is just the beginning. Look around you and be creative with what you have on hand.