How to avoid scams when looking for a dominatrix
We often talk about customer selection, but I think it's just as important for customers to choose with care and caution. the Dominatrices to avoid scams. When a customer gets ripped off, it hurts ALL trustworthy professionals. I've already covered some of these points in another article, but they're worth repeating.
As most of you know, I feel it's my duty to educate as best I can (based on my own personal experience and opinions, of course), whether you decide to apply for a session with me or with another Dominatrix.
So how can you be sure you're going to have an extraordinary experience when you take the plunge and look for a Professional Dominatrix ? Here are a few tips to help you avoid scams.
Its presence on social networks
Is it active on several social networking platforms? The majority of Trustworthy Dominas have at least one account Fetlifemore Twitter, Instagram, Facebookand often a site like OnlyFans. How long has she been on these sites? Does she always post the same things, or does she show variety? Do all her posts boil down to ordering you to "pay up, you insignificant pig", or does she post about other subjects? Does she interact with her community? Is she followed by many other well-known Dominatrixes?
Does the experience she claims to have match her social networking presence? If she says she has years of experience, but created her Twitter account two months ago, beware (sometimes our accounts are deleted, so this may be a reason, but a reason is not always the same). Dominatrix can quickly recreate a suitable new account).
Verification videos are useless. Scroll down her news feed and see what she's posted over the years. This will also give you a better idea of the person you're engaging with.
The photos
Are all her photos in the same three lingerie sets? Does she have quality fetish clothes? Even if you're not a fetishist, pay attention to this. Any Dominatrix, who's invested in her work, has a variety of vinyl/latex/leather pieces that she'll show off at least occasionally in her photos, and I find that a good indication of her seriousness.
Does she have photos of her play area? Even Dominatrices who hold their sessions at home invest in quality equipment. What about her toys? If her whip looks like it came from AliExpress, it's probably not a good sign. A little digression, which reminds me that I need to take some photos of the new additions to the 'Justice Room'!
Does she show up in a variety of settings? Most of the Professional Dominatrixes take part in game nights and other events, visit other dungeons, do sessions with other Mistresses, and so on. If she only has photos of herself in a frame, then she probably won't have much experience.
Are there any photos of her in her daily clothes/out of costume? its keep ? Yes, we use social networks primarily to promote our brand, but most of us will show a candid photo of our interests outside the dungeon once in a while. Those of you who follow me on Twitter know that my news feed is filled with photos of food and travel, two of my other passions.
Note, however, that just because she doesn't reveal her face doesn't mean she isn't real. Even the best of us have reasons for doing this, such as personal safety, to protect our loved ones, or many other factors. I know various wonderful Dominatrices all over the world who cherish their private lives and don't want to be identified on the street. That doesn't mean they aren't exceptional Dommes.
The website
If it doesn't have a website, it's a big red flag. It's our store window, our boutique. It doesn't have to be fancy, but it should include her location, her selection criteria, a variety of photographs (again, in different settings and with good equipment), and her preferred practices. Even if she doesn't do live sessions, she should probably have a website.
There are some very good young Dommes who use social networks exclusively to attract submissives. Again, this is only one factor in determining whether she's for real. If she's on lots of different networks and doesn't raise any other red flags, maybe she's attracted enough customers that she doesn't need a website.
The selection
While you're choosing your future Dominatrix, find out about her selection criteria too.
How does it communicate with potential new customers? If it only takes place on Snapchat, WhatsApp, or in private messages on social networks, beware. Most of us prefer emails followed by a phone or video call.
Down payments
Most of the professionals require a depositHowever, if she gives cause for concern in other areas and asks for a deposit of 100% for the first session with you, you'd better get a move on! If you're not sure, ask if she offers 'social time'. Pay for a ten- or fifteen-minute video call before committing to a multi-hour session that could cost hundreds or thousands of euros. It hurts a lot less to lose €50 than €1,000.
Does it offer various options for making the down payment? If they only use one platform (CashApp or Le Pot Commun, for example), be careful. I have two different credit card payment processing systems, plus many, many other options available. That's the case for most of my friends. Professional Dominatrixes.
The first interactions
Did she offer you a bidding contract right from the start? Don't be fooled.
Was she the first to initiate contact? Don't be fooled. No true professional pursues submissives; they come to us.
Did she start the session immediately, without being paid? Beware! A good Dominatrix won't insult you until she's received some form of compensation (and set some limits!). Before that point, it will be strictly professional. For example, if you contact me for a session, I'm very polite and professional. I state the facts, I don't go into detail about what I'm about to do to you when we play. We discuss your limitsWe'll make an appointment, then you'll pay a deposit. From then on, I'll start teasing you, but never before. If she comes into your private messages insulting you from the start, you've most likely stumbled upon a scammer.
Bonus points
Website history. One of my customers goes so far as to check out the archive.org to see how long her site has been up and running. It's a great way to establish how long she's been working as a professional Dominatrix. (Thanks for the tip, Olivier)
Testimonials from other customers. This can be on her website (although they can be easily falsified) where she publishes what submissives have written about her. Take an interest in the diversity of literary styles if it's on her site. You can also find review sites for sex workers in your area.
A blog. If she takes the time to write once in a while, it shows that she's willing to make an effort to show what she knows.
Passion. Does she give the impression of being invested in what she does?
Practices. They should match yours.
Security. Does she seem to care about her customers' well-being? This is, of course, super important in the dungeon, but for virtual games too, she should know how to set limits.
Final score
Use your common sense. If something sounds too good to be true, it usually is. You get what you pay for, so don't hesitate to invest in quality. Meet a Professional Domina is expensive, but it creates memories you'll cherish for a long time. Take the time you need to do your research so that those memories are positive and you don't beat yourself up for making the wrong decision.