Sadistic laughter: testimony January 2022
Sadistic laughter
I'd already had previous experience with a Professional Dominatrix. A short experience, 4/5 sessions at most. An initiation. This Domina offered me a magnificent opening into an unknown world, secretly fantasized, a priori impenetrable for me, sulphurous and forbidden. I'll always be grateful to him for that.
But I felt the need to go beyond that, to test other sensations, and probably also my limits. Above all, I dreamed of more "hard" scenes, whips and riding crops that snap around me...a more assumed perversity and sadism. But without knowing exactly where to go, without being able to precisely define my desires and needs. And I didn't really know whether reality could match my fantasy; would I be able to keep it up?
Obsessed by these thoughts, I started wandering around the internet, looking at some specialist sites, searching. By chance, I came across the website of Inanna Justice. I was immediately fascinated by her photos, videos and writings. I shuddered when I read the testimonies of some of her submissives; I was moved when I read the kindness in her words.
I answered his questionnaire/contact form, trying to do it right, i.e. trying to explain in writing what I liked or didn't like about it. It was a difficult exercise, since, as a good beginner, I had hardly experienced anything... how could I really know what I liked? What I could and couldn't do? I threw myself into the adventure.
After an initial pleasant video exchange scheduled for the very next day, where I was able to discover a smiling, pleasant (and reassuring) person, the first session was scheduled for two days later, on a Sunday at 4pm; very quickly indeed, almost too quickly I thought. Barely enough time to prepare myself mentally... well, in fact, during those 48 hours of waiting, not only did I not prepare myself at all, but my state of feverishness increased all the time.
I was going through all kinds of emotions; excitement and apprehension were growing. I drew up all sorts of scenarios, I made films, I imagined a thousand old or new fantasies that might or might not come true, I asked myself all sorts of questions; in reality I was freaking out just fine.
And then came the time, the day and the hour to get there; the stress reached its peak as I arrived at the foot of her building. As I climbed the stairs, my stomach churning, the door ajar, I was immediately greeted by a tall, beautiful woman in a leather skirt and leather boots, with two piercing blue eyes. She immediately impressed me, physically, and at the same time made me feel confident with her radiant smile.
I immediately sensed in his eyes and smile the benevolence I had come to expect from reading his texts. We exchanged a few words over a drink before getting down to business. Once this initial confidence-building phase was over, she suggested I go to the bathroom, take a shower, put on my appropriate clothes - i.e. nude - and knock on the door when I was ready.
I knocked. She opened the door. And there I was, not quite the same person in front of me. The gaze had changed, more piercing, firmer, more directive. She immediately grabbed my face with her right hand. She stared at me with hypnotic blue eyes. Immediately, I felt her powerful will to assert her physical and mental control over me. She took me to the "equipped" room, made me kneel down, and put a collar on me to signify my new status as a submissive, inferior to her, ready to submit to her sadistic desires...
I won't go into the details of everything I've been through and that she's put me through, I'll keep that to myself... At the end of the session, ultimate mark of sadism, she showed me a die and indicated that she would whip me with her terrible dragon whip single tail for the time indicated by the die...
Unfortunately - for her, lucky for me - the dice on the floor showed the number 1, 1 minute of torment...she was obviously disappointed...She cracked her whip in the room, the dull thud that erupted made me tremble with fear...and a new shameful pleasure. She began to drip me with her whip, just enough for a first session in her opinion, not too much so as not to go too far. She said, "You've got a body that can take a beating", implying that we could have a lot of fun together.
1 minute is both long and short, especially when you have the sadism to put the clock in front of you as you take the blows...
I still have red marks on my buttocks and hips...when I touch them and look at them tonight, as I write these lines, I must confess that it was my favorite moment of the session...along with the one when she whispered in my ear some perverse wordsI'd "end up jerking off thinking about her in the next few days as soon as I grazed my burning nipples...". Her bursts of sadistic laughter still make me shiver.
By going to see Madame without really knowing what to expect, and given her reputation as a "heavy-handed" sadist, I was perhaps taking the risk of having a very bad time and ending up disgusted with BDSM forever. It was quite the opposite, as she alternated sweet and savory with such talent.
Ultimately, I'm afraid Madame has me addicted to her sadism, her perversity, the warmth of her body, her scent, her hot breath, her words whispered in my ear, the power of her gaze and her blows, the thrill of her skin.
Madame, you've enveloped me. Thank you for that.
